Eight steps to creating a life you love.

Living your best life - a life worth living - may not come naturally.

Many of us want a life filled with purpose, joy, and fulfilment, but somehow, we find ourselves feeling stuck, overwhelmed, or simply, lost. Creating a life we love involves intentional steps and a commitment to our well-being.

Here are some essential strategies to help you embark on this journey:

How to create a life you love

1. Self-Reflection:

   • Begin with introspection. One of my very favourite sayings is Carl Jung's: “Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.” To know where we need to go, we first need to understand where we are. What are your values, passions, and strengths? What makes you feel alive? What activities or experiences bring you joy? What do you struggle with? What would you like to improve? Journaling, meditation, and talking to a trusted friend or coach can help uncover these insights.

2. Set Clear Outcomes:

   • Once you have a clearer understanding of what is important, set specific, achievable outcomes of what you would like to pursue. What do you want your life to look and feel like? What needs to happen for you to rate your life as great? This may be very simple - such as ‘have a better relationship with my co-workers’ or ‘have my own successful business’. Break these down and ask yourself - why is this important to me? This gives you some groundwork and motivation to set you in the right direction. Start to think about what steps are necessary to get to where you want to go. You might want to try the “Best Possible Self Exercise” to help you focus on some future goals: - you can read about this here and download a guide to this here.

3. Mindful Living:

• Embrace mindfulness to stay present and appreciate the journey. Mindfulness practices, such as meditation or simply being aware of your surroundings in the present moment, can reduce stress and increase your overall sense of well-being. Mindful living is also about noticing what you appreciate and what brings you joy. Cherishing these moments helps you notice when life is nurturing your soul. You can find out more about mindfulness here and meditation here. You can even practice a brief meditation with me here.

4. Seek Inspiration:

• Read books, watch documentaries, or listen to podcasts on topics that intrigue you. Visit museums and art galleries. Consider art classes or pottery classes. Seek new opportunities to experience new things. Find out what is around in your local neighbourhood. Exposure to new ideas can spark new passions. You can also get inspired by breaking up your usual routine - wake up earlier than usual and watch the sunrise. Take a different route to work or take public transport instead of driving. These things can break you out of your everyday automatic patterns and thinking.

5. Healthy Lifestyle:

• Prioritize physical & mental health through balanced nutrition (read about how food impacts mood here), regular exercise, and adequate sleep. Your physical well-being profoundly impacts your mental and emotional health as well as your resilience when things get a little tough. Read more about building resilience here.

6. Continuous Learning:

• Lifelong learning keeps the mind engaged and opens up new possibilities. Whether through formal education, hobbies, or travel, continuously seek growth. Taking a night class or enlisting in an online course can also be inspiring and give you a sense of achievement.

7. Resilience Building:

• Life is full of challenges. Developing resilience helps you bounce back from setbacks and view them as opportunities for growth. Understand that life is full of ups and downs and we don’t need to be happy all the time. Learn to ‘go with the flow’ a little. Sit with the challenging times and ask yourself - ‘What can this teach me?’ ‘What can I learn from this situation’? Difficult times can be a huge space for learning. Practice self-compassion and self-kindess Another way to seek resilience is to imagine if the challenge you are facing is a game. How would you approach it? What or who would be your allies? How many other ways can you approach this problem? Practice self-compassion and seek support when needed.

8. Purpose and Contribution:

• Find ways to contribute to something larger than yourself. Whether through volunteer work, community involvement, or your professional life, contributing to the well-being of others adds meaning to your own life. This can be something small - picking up litter for example, or helping out at your local animal shelter.

Some extra hints to creating a life you love:

1. Start Small:

   • If you struggle to get started - begin with low-pressure activities that you used to enjoy. It could be reading, walking, or listening to music. These small steps can reignite a spark of interest and joy.

2. Reflect on Your Childhood:

   • Think about what activities you loved as a child. These early interests can often provide clues about your innate passions.

3. Journaling:

   • Write about your feelings, thoughts, and daily experiences. This practice can help you identify patterns and uncover hidden interests and values.

4. Create a Vision Board:

   • Visualize your goals and interests by creating a board with images and words that resonate with you.

5. Professional Guidance:

   • Working with a mental health professional or life coach can provide personalized support and strategies for discovering your passions and values.

Remember, understanding your passions and values is a journey, not a destination. It requires time, patience, and self-compassion. It may require a change in direction. Embrace the process and be open to the discoveries you make along the way.

If you're struggling to navigate this journey on your own, consider seeking support from a qualified mental health professional. As a mental health nurse and life coach, I offer personalized guidance to help you uncover your passions and values. Together, we can develop strategies to overcome obstacles and build a life that resonates with your true self.

Helen is a registered nurse and life coach, specialising in mental health from a holistic perspective. She is passionate about supporting people to have optimal mental health and well-being.

Based in New Zealand, Helen is available for talks, education sessions and online assessments.

• Get in touch with Helen here

• Purchase the Mini Guide to Mental Well-being here

• Do her online course in Changing Lives here

If you would like some help recovering from a difficult time in your life - please get in contact with me!